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The States, Day 1 of 2008

Wow! Day 1 is officially over for this year's visit to the United States. I wouldn't really count yesterday as Day 1 because I arrived at 10PM. Gah, the flight seemed shorter than usual. Maybe the planes are getting faster. I guess I was lucky for my seating number in the plane. Right in front of me was the comfort room. Seriously, it was right in front of me. Well, that meant that I had nothing to push me back since no one's in front of me to recline their seats in front of my face. So that's cool. Plus, I had so much leg space. I guess I was just bothered by the amount of people lining up to use the comfort room. It was *also disturbing* because I KNEW how long everyone took in the comfort room. Sometimes, I could hear the flushing. Good thing I didn't hear the nasty shit sounds!

The person I sat next to was this girl with glasses. I have nothing to post about her. She's so... normal, I guess. She laughed during the funny moments in the movie, and she sleeps without sound. Since the seats are grouped together in threes, I would be sitting at the left part of the group so I guess I only have one real seatmate. The other person in our group was this business man. What can I say... he farted when he was sleeping. I think it shocked me and the girl with glasses which led to us displaying our facial expressions of disgust.

When the time came for me to come out of the plane, they grouped together all the young people who traveled alone. There were five of us. When I stayed back because my step-mom's also a flight attendant, they didn't hear my reason. This prompted this American who said he didn't know much Tagalog to yell:

"EEH-KAW! EEH-KAW! BYI-LIS! DAH-LIH-YAN MOW! DAH-LIH-KAH!"

...which is in the form of accented faux-Tagalog which in Tagalog translates to:

"Ikaw! Ikaw! Bilis! Dalian mo! Dali ka!

He couldn't pull off the pronunciations correctly and I would've said the words dumb, fucking, white trash, wannabe, bitch, and ass in the same sentence if I wasn't such a nice guy. [/lie] Ah, all is well now I guess. I got here safely and I finally got to see my Naruto Shadow Box, a wooden shelf thing that's filled with 27 volumes of Naruto, the ninja manga. XD

Now, during my real first day, there were a lot of things that happened. First, as we were on the road, on the way back to our house, there was this "black momma" who didn't have her signal light things in the back on when it was needed to be on. And by black momma, I don't mean old, fat, and black. I mean thin, young, black, and even has a cap/beret on her head. Anyway, her lack of signaling prompted Billy, my step-dad to use his dreaded mic in his "Little Dixie", the term which he uses to refer to his car.

Wait, aren't those things *illegal* or something? I guess it's just good that he didn't get arrested because when I asked him, he just replied with "They sell it in stores, must be legal. Know what's illegal? Marijuana--they don't sell 'em in stores.", which I just laughed at. Anyway, when he grabbed his microphone, I knew it was going to be trouble. Remember, all this was happening while we were in his car and we were moving on the road. He said:

"Now, drive safely now and put your signals on when switching lanes."

This made *everyone* on the road to put their signal light things on. They probably thought that there was a cop nearby. I swear I saw the black momma do the "OH SHI-" expression. She probably did a facepalm in her car too. I thought everything was fine because no one knew who the supposed "cop" was. Then, he spoke on the mic again and said something like "Have a nice day, folks!" and he used his modified honk that seriously sounds like an ice cream truck jingle. This led to black momma finding out who it was and she flipped us the bird. Yes, she bad-signed us. It would be wrong if I wrote that she fucked us anyway. XD

Another interesting thing that happened would be when we were loading the car and we were next to this black family. I guess I was the only one who could hear what they were saying. Every other sentence they said had a profanity in it. Ah, and the way they say their words, I simply love it. It ranged from "Get in the motherfuckin' car NOW!" to a safer "Get with it, foo'.", which I giggled at the moment I heard it.

Other than that, I guess the other things I encountered were just short, weird instances like when I saw this lady sitting on a bench and I thought that a sexual predator wearing flamboyant clothes had his arms around the lady. It turned out that it was Ronald McDonald. It was a weird bench anyway 'cause it had him in the middle with his arms spread out in a relaxing manner. Rape clown.... XD

Phew, this has been a long, long post. I guess this would amuse me when I view it during the latter parts of my life. Let's just hope Blogger doesn't shut down or my blog gets deleted. Ah yes, I just recently found out about someone in my family knowing about my blog. I think it's my uncle, Vincent. He knows Tanya and Denise's names for some reason and I found MSWord files in this computer entitled "x", "xx", "xxx", "xxxx", and so on.... When I checked them out, they turned out to be my damned blog entries. So whoever you are, you know that this isn't meant for you. SO GTFO! XDDDD